Many people who get involved with Crossfit equate it on some level with Fight Club. It’s hard to blame them when you see the places they overlap. You’ve got a group of people meeting in out-of-the-way places, punishing their bodies over and over, rebuilding their bodies, their minds and their entire outlook on life. Not to mention the fact that the first few workouts, you’re going to feel like you were on the losing end of a lopsided fight.
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Theory of Crossfit Relativity
First off, for my readers who don’t do Crossfit, 98% of this post will make no sense to you. Crossfitters and the brave non-Crossfitters, read on…
Aside from being a genius, many people often bring up the fact that Albert Einstein was a major proponent of Crossfit. Of course, in the finest tradition of what passes for journalism in 2010, “many people” means me. But rest assured, I have it on good authority (me again) that all of my facts are sound.
“Let the bodies hit the floor.” – Albert Einstein
The most notable of of Einstein’s accomplishments achieved during Crossfit (aside from his sub-2 minute Fran time – the man was an animal) was his Theory of Crossfit Relativity. From what I’ve uncovered in my Einstein/Crossfit research, the theory was developed during a workout much like the one we had today at CFNH:
4 minute AMRAP
3 Cleans, 115/75
6 CTB Pull ups
rest 3 minutes
4 minute AMRAP
3 SDHP, 115/75
6 Burpees
rest 5 minutes
4 minutes to get a max OHS
Einsetin noted that during the AMRAP phase four minutes appeared to slow down, lasting approximately ten minutes. Yet during the rest period, time was accelerated – three minutes actually lasted about one minute and five minutes around two and one half. The most intriguing finding was in the final part of the workout. His previous findings would seem to indicate the last four minutes would be, if not ten minutes long, at least substantially longer than the actual four minutes. Instead, time once again sped up. The final round of work was a subjective two minutes long.
After making a substantial sweat angel on the floor for one minute (ten minutes in real-time), he crawled over to his journal and wrote down the start of what would be his most famous equation: “E=mcowww” Or, in layman’s terms, “Energy equals mass times the speed of light raised to the power of how much I hate AMRAPs.”
Then, being a true Crossfitter and Man of Science, Einstein puked.
The best laid plans of mice and men…
Hey gang,
So it’s been a little while since I’ve posted (real posts, not the Twitter freakout that I didn’t realize was happening) yet again. Many, many things have been happening here in Moondoggieland and as usually happens with me when a lot of stuff is going on, I put off mentioning it until so much has happened that it becomes all awkward and winds up in a long post. So, here’s the long post – grab a drink and get comfortable.
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Dude, seriously…
But Dad…
In the Words of Tom Jones…
Technology and Catholicism
First off, I suppose I should mention that the subject of this post is referring to two different subjects. I’m assuming most of you already surmised this since you already know about the Robo-Pope. Don’t give me that look. Why did you think every pope’s name ends with a version number?
Anyway, the first part of the subject refers to my new iPhone. Yes, I’ve finally given up my telephonic Luddite ways and shelled out some money to Jobs & Co. I’m not really anti-Apple as such, just more anti-AT&T. But my old phone really sucked and I was far enough along into my AT&T plan to where I no longer had to pay full price for one of these little black beauties.
Uh oh. Here come the hits from weird Google searches…
Anyway, the sole reason I bring all of that up is that I’m currently typing all of this on said iPhone. In true geek fashion, I’m doing this with my laptop open on my lap, forgoing its small keys for the iPhone’s miniscule ones. But don’t cry for me, Argentina – I needed to see how this works when I’m laptop-less and I have a nifty little stylus to type with since my fingers are like sausages.
Holy crap – I just published the post and it frickin’ worked! Ain’t technology grand?
Speaking of holy crap, now we get to me griping about Catholics. One moment while I switch to a more rant-friendly keyboard…
I’m not doing it anymore
That is, not doing the thing I was referencing in the last post, FIVE MONTHS AGO. Almost SIX. Oy vey.
The good news (sorta) is, I’m putting together a daily schedule for myself to try to get my life in order and under control and being electronically social is one of the things that’s going to have its own daily block of time. Who knows? Maybe I’ll start answering emails now!
I’m Doing It Again.
Now granted, I’ve had a hectic almost-two-weeks since getting back from the Georgian Business Trip and I’m currently sicker than a dog (since Phoebe is healthy, other than moping around because Mom & Dad are sick). However, I’m falling into the same old pattern. “I can’t do a post about this thing ’cause I haven’t done a post about that thing yet. And I haven’t gotten the site all together yet. And I haven’t beefed up the ukulele section yet. Or even TOLD people I’m playing it yet! OMG! OMG! OMG! Peeeeeeeee.”
Oh, by the way – I’m a whore.
If you happened to hover over or, God forbid, click on either the Matt Costa or TuneTech Tuner links in the previous posts, you will have noticed they take you over to Amazon. Selling out’s in the air this morning, and I figured, what the hell – it’s affiliate link time! I still stand by my stance that this sort of thing won’t creep over into CiMB (once I get it restarted), but while you’re in my brain, feel free to toss me a couple of coins. If you want. I might put one of those “Gimme Gimme Gimme Something From My Wish List” boxes too. And maybe a couple of “You know what, just send me money” links.
Or maybe I’ll feel dirty and take it all down.