Another crazy morning. Literally. As in “insane.” Seriously.

This is the Tune Tech TT500 Backlit Clip Style Tuner which keeps my ukulele sounding so gloriously in tune:

Tune Tech TT500 Backlit Clip Style Tuner
Tune Tech TT500 Backlit Clip Style Tuner

It’s a relatively small device, no more than a couple of inches at its longest dimension. However, this small device has the full potential to destroy your morning.

This is our last day at the Home Office in Smyrna, GA. I woke up before my roommate and spent the time between then and when he finished his shower getting everything packed. I was all packed (except for my shower stuff) by the time he was done, so I had a leisurely morning ahead. I took my shower, got dressed, packed all of my toiletries and thought to myself “Oh yeah, last night I was going to make sure my tuner was packed with my electronics rather than with my ukulele (so there would be no reason to search the uke case at security).”

I checked the case – no tuner. Perfect. For once I did something when I thought about it, rather than waiting until the morning of, and I was proud of myself. Until…

It occurred to me that just that morning I had repacked my electronics bag to make everything fit right, and I couldn’t remember putting my tuner in there. You probably know where this is going.

I checked the electronics bag. The pocket that was in. The other backpack pockets. The pockets of all the pants I wore (since I couldn’t remember what I wore yesterday). I checked the electronics bag again. I checked the microwave. The refrigerator. The bathroom. All the drawers. I stripped the sheets off the bed. I found a way to pull the bed away from the wall. I took the pillowcases off the pillows. I completely emptied my backpack and all sub-bags inside it (including the electronics bag for the fourth or fifth time). At that point, I was 30 minutes behind schedule and I knew my ride and roommate had both been waiting downstairs for me that whole time. I resigned myself to the fact that either the tuner was lost, or it was in the one bag I didn’t check because I couldn’t imagine how I would have put it in there.

That’s right. I checked the microwave, but didn’t check one of my bags because it “didn’t seem likely.” I was so worked up and sweaty by that point, I had to bring that bag into work, since it’s where I put my few remaining clean clothes. As we’re walking down the hall, I suddenly picture the tuner. How last night I decided to put it in a brown plastic bag along with my fretboard stamp because “since it’s with my other ukulele stuff, I’ll know where it is.” I pictured me putting that bag in the small bag this morning as I thought “This brown bag only has my fretboard stamp, so I’ll put it in the checked luggage.”

I get to the conference room, pull out the top two layers of clothes (including a new shirt), and there’s the brown bag. With my fretboard stamp. And my ink pad. And my frickin’ tuner.

Son of a bitch.

And Another Thing (So to Speak)

Now there’s an Extenze commercial on and I’m thinking about placing an order. I’ve always wanted to be taller. Oh wait. Now that I’ve watched a little more of the commercial, I see I misunderstood the “size enhancement” claims. Good thing I didn’t place the order yet – my appendix is large enough. Unless they’re talking about some other “certain organ down there” that I’m not thinking of.

Oh yeah, and in hindsight, it probably would have been better to use “Georgia” in the title. Or maybe “Smyrna.” But I’m not a perfectionist, so it doesn’t bother me at all. I’m not going to stay up all night, tossing and turning, fighting to keep myself from going back and changing that title.

Because it’s morning.

I’m 38 – I Need a Real Hat.

Today is Day 2 of my week off, so after my weekly visit with Dr. B, I decided to stop by DelMonico Hatter in New Haven to try on some hats. Barb is convinced that I don’t have a “hat head,” but I know she’s gotta be wrong. My head is gorgeous, right?

So after trying on every hat in the store (well, every straw hat, it being summer and all), I found two that didn’t make me look completely dorky. Barry at DelMonico was super-nice & took photos of me in each so I could run them by Sarge. I mean, Barb. The hats in the photos don’t look quite as good as they did when I looked in the mirror, but I think that was mostly due to me being self-conscious about how I should pose to best reflect the hats’ awesomeness.
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Here he comes, here comes Moondoggie…

We recently switched from DirecTV to the World of Comcast, and today’s On-Demand movie menu had Speed Racer on it.

First, I’d like to state for the record (as we know blogs on the internet are even more legally binding than being sworn in at a trial) that I’ve never smoked pot. I’ve been around people who have and, while I respect their choice, I can’t get past the smell of it. That said, this movie made me want two things: the biggest home theater in the world and a bong. As pretty and enjoyable as the movie was, I can’t help but feel I’m missing something being sober and watching it on a 32″ Sylvania. At the very least, maybe it would override my innate sense of physics that kept messing with the racing scenes.
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