First off, I suppose I should mention that the subject of this post is referring to two different subjects. I’m assuming most of you already surmised this since you already know about the Robo-Pope. Don’t give me that look. Why did you think every pope’s name ends with a version number?
Anyway, the first part of the subject refers to my new iPhone. Yes, I’ve finally given up my telephonic Luddite ways and shelled out some money to Jobs & Co. I’m not really anti-Apple as such, just more anti-AT&T. But my old phone really sucked and I was far enough along into my AT&T plan to where I no longer had to pay full price for one of these little black beauties.
Uh oh. Here come the hits from weird Google searches…
Anyway, the sole reason I bring all of that up is that I’m currently typing all of this on said iPhone. In true geek fashion, I’m doing this with my laptop open on my lap, forgoing its small keys for the iPhone’s miniscule ones. But don’t cry for me, Argentina – I needed to see how this works when I’m laptop-less and I have a nifty little stylus to type with since my fingers are like sausages.
Holy crap – I just published the post and it frickin’ worked! Ain’t technology grand?
Speaking of holy crap, now we get to me griping about Catholics. One moment while I switch to a more rant-friendly keyboard…
That is, not doing the thing I was referencing in the last post, FIVE MONTHS AGO. Almost SIX. Oy vey.
The good news (sorta) is, I’m putting together a daily schedule for myself to try to get my life in order and under control and being electronically social is one of the things that’s going to have its own daily block of time. Who knows? Maybe I’ll start answering emails now!
Now granted, I’ve had a hectic almost-two-weeks since getting back from the Georgian Business Trip and I’m currently sicker than a dog (since Phoebe is healthy, other than moping around because Mom & Dad are sick). However, I’m falling into the same old pattern. “I can’t do a post about this thing ’cause I haven’t done a post about that thing yet. And I haven’t gotten the site all together yet. And I haven’t beefed up the ukulele section yet. Or even TOLD people I’m playing it yet! OMG! OMG! OMG! Peeeeeeeee.”
If you happened to hover over or, God forbid, click on either the Matt Costa or TuneTech Tuner links in the previous posts, you will have noticed they take you over to Amazon. Selling out’s in the air this morning, and I figured, what the hell – it’s affiliate link time! I still stand by my stance that this sort of thing won’t creep over into CiMB (once I get it restarted), but while you’re in my brain, feel free to toss me a couple of coins. If you want. I might put one of those “Gimme Gimme Gimme Something From My Wish List” boxes too. And maybe a couple of “You know what, just send me money” links.
Or maybe I’ll feel dirty and take it all down.
So I’m semi-watching 30 Rock on TiVo (I loooooves me some 30 Rock, but it’s a repeat, so 1/2 of my attention is on that and 1/2 on the laptop) when one of the latest iPhone commercials comes on.
Now, with Apple commercials nowadays, you know what to expect. If it’s a commercial about their computers, it’s going to be John Hodgeman and not-John-Hodgeman, and if it’s for their “personal electronics” it’ll be a closeup of the product, hands and fresh new perky music you probably haven’t heard before but will be hearing everywhere soon.
It’s all looking potentially quite saucy for you now, as the planet of love, Venus, enters your sign just as the eclipse fires up your Intimacy Zone. If you know that you’ve lost the art of seduction, and you wish you hadn’t, this is your chance to go off and do something about it. Get in touch with your Inner Goddess – and if you think that sounds ridiculous, it’s not! The Goddess dwells in every female. Google “Venus Aphrodite” or “Lakshmi”. Bringing these Goddesses out in your spirit could actually change your life in wonderful ways you never dreamed of. – WeTV.com
Who am I to argue with Lakshmi?
This is the Tune Tech TT500 Backlit Clip Style Tuner which keeps my ukulele sounding so gloriously in tune:
It’s a relatively small device, no more than a couple of inches at its longest dimension. However, this small device has the full potential to destroy your morning.
This is our last day at the Home Office in Smyrna, GA. I woke up before my roommate and spent the time between then and when he finished his shower getting everything packed. I was all packed (except for my shower stuff) by the time he was done, so I had a leisurely morning ahead. I took my shower, got dressed, packed all of my toiletries and thought to myself “Oh yeah, last night I was going to make sure my tuner was packed with my electronics rather than with my ukulele (so there would be no reason to search the uke case at security).”
I checked the case – no tuner. Perfect. For once I did something when I thought about it, rather than waiting until the morning of, and I was proud of myself. Until…
It occurred to me that just that morning I had repacked my electronics bag to make everything fit right, and I couldn’t remember putting my tuner in there. You probably know where this is going.
I checked the electronics bag. The pocket that was in. The other backpack pockets. The pockets of all the pants I wore (since I couldn’t remember what I wore yesterday). I checked the electronics bag again. I checked the microwave. The refrigerator. The bathroom. All the drawers. I stripped the sheets off the bed. I found a way to pull the bed away from the wall. I took the pillowcases off the pillows. I completely emptied my backpack and all sub-bags inside it (including the electronics bag for the fourth or fifth time). At that point, I was 30 minutes behind schedule and I knew my ride and roommate had both been waiting downstairs for me that whole time. I resigned myself to the fact that either the tuner was lost, or it was in the one bag I didn’t check because I couldn’t imagine how I would have put it in there.
That’s right. I checked the microwave, but didn’t check one of my bags because it “didn’t seem likely.” I was so worked up and sweaty by that point, I had to bring that bag into work, since it’s where I put my few remaining clean clothes. As we’re walking down the hall, I suddenly picture the tuner. How last night I decided to put it in a brown plastic bag along with my fretboard stamp because “since it’s with my other ukulele stuff, I’ll know where it is.” I pictured me putting that bag in the small bag this morning as I thought “This brown bag only has my fretboard stamp, so I’ll put it in the checked luggage.”
I get to the conference room, pull out the top two layers of clothes (including a new shirt), and there’s the brown bag. With my fretboard stamp. And my ink pad. And my frickin’ tuner.
Son of a bitch.
The best part of a lousy day.
Now there’s an Extenze commercial on and I’m thinking about placing an order. I’ve always wanted to be taller. Oh wait. Now that I’ve watched a little more of the commercial, I see I misunderstood the “size enhancement” claims. Good thing I didn’t place the order yet – my appendix is large enough. Unless they’re talking about some other “certain organ down there” that I’m not thinking of.
Oh yeah, and in hindsight, it probably would have been better to use “Georgia” in the title. Or maybe “Smyrna.” But I’m not a perfectionist, so it doesn’t bother me at all. I’m not going to stay up all night, tossing and turning, fighting to keep myself from going back and changing that title.
Because it’s morning.